Introduction

AnneFrank once said, “I see the world being slowly transformed into a wilderness; I hear the approaching thunder that, one day, will destroy us too. I feel the suffering of millions. And yet, when I look up at the sky, I somehow feel that everything will change for the better, that this cruelty too shall end, that peace and tranquility will return once more.”^[1] This is nothing more than what I and most of my fellow countrymen and women feel. In the shadow of the unspeakable atrocities, where children are torn from their mothers’ arms, women and men are left widows and bear the scars of unimaginable violence, the heart cry is still gripping each citizen’s heart. In South Sudan, I have seen things that still wake me at night: kids taken from their mothers, whole families disappearing, and women, both young and old, are being raped and abused.

In the middle of all this horror, one question kept hitting me: How do I follow Jesus when everything around me is falling apart? If Christ hadn’t reached down and changed me, I would be full of hate, tribalistic, and a lover of self, maybe even toward the people closer to me. South Sudan did its best to break me, but Jesus Christ rebuilt me back together, and stronger. This is my real-life story, and it’s an invitation to all South Sudanese that we need to keep living our faith when the world feels like it's ending. It’s a call to live faith boldly in chaos.

SOUTH SUDAN TRIED TO BREAK ME

Amid the ongoing conflict in South Sudan, Christians find themselves in grave stress, not only from persecution but from imminent hatred due to their background. Not only that, but they are being overwhelmed by the suffering of their communities and the agony of their loved ones, and that’s all of us as humanity. In the heart of our beloved country, no soul, be it the weathered elders with eyes heavy from the lost yesterdays, the adults burdened by endless tomorrows, the youth whose dreams bleed into dust, or the innocent child divided from their mothers, can deny the brutal grip of this conflict and division. It has shattered us and infused hatred and disunity among us. It created a continuous wound that we all mourn in silence, though most of us never get a chance to express it.

With death that surrounds every corner of our Country, it has created an environment where asking about someone’s well-being often leads to the heartbreaking response: with tears in eyes, "He/she is no more." Death once was a piece of news shared only among elders, but now, even children are exposed to it. Death’s news was once not randomly shared in our tradition, but today, it’s never concealed from children anymore because of its simplicity. Death has become simple because it has become a norming norm. Women, who were in the past the very people who were the victims of heartbreaking situations, are no longer terrified but are becoming counselors instead of counselees.

In October 2020, I traveled to Panyijiar County in Unity State, South Sudan, during the rainy season, a time when floods displaced snakes and other creatures seeking higher ground. Tragically, one of my uncles, Kuony Duäch, a loving and compassionate man from my childhood, fell victim to a snakebite. He was rushed to a clinic, but after a day-long journey from the cattle camp, he arrived too late. After 15 years without seeing my uncle, I joyfully anticipated meeting him and seeing him watching me approach, but learned that news of his passing had reached me. Shocking! I was drawn to the somber task of searching for those who would help dig his grave. As a child coming back from school outside of the country, my uncle’s wives were upset with me, believing I shouldn’t join those gatherings to bury my uncle’s body as a child.

However, with tears in my eyes, I responded, "In the country that we are in today, what has not happened and not been seen by a child?" They had no reply, and we parted, both grieving. My uncle's death was a tragic reminder of the dire lack of proper roads and medical care, even within a hospital. It was because of the conflict and division within the country that most of the tragedies occurred. There is never a day when a mother can cease crying, leave about the night where hope is to wake up and shed tears in the middle of the night.

According to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum, the sobering statistics reveal, "Since gaining independence from Sudan in 2011, the new nation of South Sudan has experienced civil war and mass atrocities against civilians, including widespread sexual violence, murder, and forced displacement. Between 2013 and 2018, over 400,000 people were killed as a result of the war. In March 2017, the United Nations Human Rights Commission determined that ethnic cleansing was being committed."^[2] This is heartbreaking and shocking to those who thought of a South Sudan where peace would be enjoyed more than before. Indeed, we live in a country where what is called human rights is no longer a right for every citizen of the South. Mothers who go to fetch firewood for survival are being rapes, and no one follows their cry. They go to fetch water from far away, where violence is the norm on their feet, as they move and come back home. Oh, what an unswallowable pill, it kills and tortures the soul. It divides homes, it divides the community, and it divides the country; however, Christ rebuilds. How do I overcome this heartache and cruel terror of division, hatred, and tribalism? The next section will unveil the greatest hope, even amid these terrors.

CHRIST REBUILT ME STRONGER

To me, if Christ hadn’t reached down and changed me, I would be full of hate, a tribalist, and a lover of self, maybe even toward the people whom I call my parents. Christ rebuilds me, how? He was and is faithful (Hebrews 3:6, 10:23, 6:18-19); my labor is not in vain (1 Corinthians 15:58); He fills me with joy (Romans 15:13); He enlightens the eyes of my heart (Ephesians 1:18); He called me to eternal life (1 Timothy 6:12); He teaches me the Gospel (2 Thessalonians 2:15); He has made me His own (Philippians 3:12-14), and not only that, but pours His love into my heart (Romans 5:5). In response to that solid truth, only the words of Lou Priolo could define my heart: “The ultimate weapon to use against those who do evil is to love them; to meet their needs.”.^[3] Indeed, what I found to be the greatest approach toward these hostilities, though formidable, is to love others and pray for their best, not damnation. What rebuilt me stronger was the idea that in Christ I’m a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17); He gives me strength (Philippians 4:13; Isaiah 41:10); He restores me (1 Peter 5:10); His grace is and was sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9-10), and all things work for my good (Romans 8:28). God’s Spirit always renews me when the world seems dark (Psalm 51:10), and hope is bygone.

Understanding that as a Christian, I should reflect Christ and be salt and light in my community, as stated in Matthew 5:13-16, Christ has not only overrun my rebellious heart but has caused me to reflect love even when it’s not deserved. In Christ, I understand that believers should identify themselves as the salt, meaning they should enhance and preserve the goodness within the world, even in the most devastated countries, where a human's death may be perceived as a means to glorify God in some doctrines. I’m to shine, which means to repel darkness and provide a beacon of hope among my community. It is Christians' duty to shine for righteousness and goodness, especially in cultures filled with hatred and division. Again, I understand that the most precious place where the outside world can glorify God is where I display my light in the world.

Even in agony, I must spread the light to those who seem to be in darkness and can’t see His light. Instead of hiding, how can I shine as light amidst turmoil or division? Should I divide? Should I hate others? John Flavel stated, “What! At peace with the Father, and at war with His children (others)? It cannot be.”^[4] Indeed, I can’t claim to be a believer while I don’t love others. I can’t be tribalistic and claim to be a child of God. I’m always reminded that believers are called to embody unity, not division or hatred. 1 Peter 3:8 urges us to show unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. In our country, I see championing unity as the only powerful act of resistance against division and hatred.

As a believer, I understand that I am mandated to pursue unity over division, hatred, and tribalism. And that is for all of us who are believers, that we are to say no to any form of affiliation that could divide our community. It should be our joy to shine and stay salty as we obey our God in displaying His nature of love. Ephesians 4:1 urges us to walk in a manner worthy of our calling. Ultimately, Christians are a unified body in Christ (Galatians 3:28). Paul said there is no distinction between Greek and Jew, why? Because they are in Christ, they are saved through the same sacrifice, the same grace, and sealed by the same Holy Spirit.

That means Christians are one and should exemplify the seven ones in Ephesians 3:4-6. With full force of love, we are to walk in unity, having in mind the unity of Godhead. I used to remember that we are not called to create disunity but break down barriers and celebrate our oneness in Christ, regardless of our backgrounds or differences (1 Corinthians 12:13). In fact, the only way that we can repel and reject division and hatred is by living out the reality of being one in Christ. Therefore, as a Christian, I have a role to play even in the darkest moments where atrocities turn every hope of unity to darkness and decay. That means Christians are to remain neutral and not blend into the world. We are to act as tools for reconciliation and peace among our communities, expressing the unity that is founded in the love and mercy of God. If our unity is found in the reality of the triune God, who, then, should we imitate as believers amid turmoils? Is it the people or God? God, of course! Christians are called to be imitators of God (Ephesians 5:1-3). To do so means to walk in love, reflecting the selfless love that Christ demonstrated through His life. With Christ in me, I embody the communicable attribute of God (1 Thessalonians 4:9-10; James 5:11). This is to say that I’m to posture a brotherly love, family love for one another, as people belonging to one family. Christians belong to one Father, and He is God, not any other, but God.

 Conclusion

My dear countrymen and women, our country may feel like a place devoid of peace and joy, but as Christians, we bear the responsibility of bringing light into the darkness, even to where a smile is considered bitter. Matthew 28:19-20 calls us to take action, making disciples of all nations while holding fast to the hope that sustains us (Hebrews 10:23, 6:18-19; 1 Corinthians 15:58; Romans 15:13; 1 Timothy 6:12; etc.). Oh, dear, it’s only through obedience, unity, and love that we can shine brightly in a country engulfed in turmoil. RichardBaxter stated, “He that is not a son of Peace is not a son of God. All other sins destroy the Church consequentially; but Division and Separation demolish it directly.”^[5] For sure, we can’t claim to be God’s children when in our hearts, we don’t speak grace, peace, and mercy.

Lastly, we should not be surprised when atrocities and suffering come to us (1 Peter 4:12), but remember the word of Jesus, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let it be afraid (John 14:27).” To me, if Christ hadn’t reached down and changed me, I would be full of hate, a tribalist, and a lover of self, maybe even toward the people whom I call my parents.

[1] “BrainyQuote.” 2019. BrainyQuote. BrainyQuote. 2019. https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/anne-frank-quotes.

[2] SouthSudanUnited States Holocaust Memorial Museum

https://www.ushmm.org › genocide-prevention › countries

[3]  Lou Priolo, The Complete Husband, Calvary Press, www.calvarypress.com, 1999, p. 134.

[4]  John Flavel, A Puritan Golden Treasury, compiled by I.D.E. Thomas, by permission of Banner of Truth, Carlisle, PA. 2000, p. 80.

[5] Quotes, Grace. 2019. “Quotes by Richard Baxter.” Grace Quotes. December 11, 2019. https://gracequotes.org/author-quote/richard-baxter/.